Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Happy Holidays All

Well folks, tomorrow starts off my week and a half long vacation back to my home in New Orleans. I'm excited about spending time with my family, turning 29 (fuck I'm getting old) and sleeping in my old bed.

Since all of my siblings moved out, my parents didn't feel the need to possess such things as cable or internet so this may be my last post of the year.

On the bright side I'm looking forward to writing more stuff next year and testing out some new ideas so my vacation will be spent brainstorming and de-stressing.

Also, now that I'm caught up on all my unwatched dvds, save money to build up my dvd collection even more. Woot.

I'm expecting the new year to rock hard so I'm officially wishing every one of you a super Happy Holiday and a great New Year. And I hope everyone gets what they want and such.

Till next year.....

Monday, December 21, 2009

My 2010 Anticipated Movies

I've been seeing a lot of "best of/worst of" 2009 lists and though I would love to sit down and make my own, it would take me a year to process my likes and dislikes. I thought maybe it would be easier to list off all the movies I'm looking forward to next year. So here goes it...

The Lovely Bones

I was upset that the December release date was pushed back to Jan. I think it only played in very selected cities or at least just L.A. so either way, I won't get to see it till 2010. I read the book and thought it was sadly beautiful so I was drawn to see what Peter Jackson would do with it and now in 2010, I'll finally know.


Adam Green has made my list as one of my favorite directors just based on how much I love Hatchet and how much of a poster boy he is for horror lovers. At L.A. Fango Weekend of Horrors, Green discussed Frozen and said it was like Open Water on a ski lift. I just watched the trailer and wow, that's the best way to describe it. The thing I love about these kinds of movies is the "how the fuck do we get out of this?" situation. When I first heard about it, I thought, "well, can't someone just jump and get help?" That kinda looks like it would maybe hurt. Check out the trailer here- http://www.apple.com/trailers/independent/frozen/

Alice in Wonderland

Let it be known that I love, love, love! Alice in Wonderland. It's my absolute favorite Disney movie. I yearn for the day that I get to witness some sort of American McGee's version of Alice but I'm fond of Tim Burton so I'm hoping for the best here. I only saw a few minutes of his Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and it scared me. Not in a good way but in a "what the crap is this?" way. I don't know how I'll feel about his take on Alice, but I know I'll harbor some great nostalgic moments and that's all I need.

P.S. Does anyone else wonder if Burton's carrying a major hard-on for Johnny Depp?

Piranha 3-D

I'm annoyed that the trailer isn't available online yet. I'm hearing that it's attached to Avatar screenings yet I went to a sneak preview where no trailers were shown at all. Wa-wa.
But ok, let's be completely honest here, I love what Aja did with The Hills Have Eyes but even if Piranha sucks 8 different kinds of ass, I don't think there's anyway I won't enjoy this. Killer fish...killing.. in 3-D. Here's my 10 bucks Hollywood, show this movie to me now.

Here's the original for anyone who hasn't seen it.

A Nightmare on Elm St. (remake)

We can all go on a debate on original vs. remake and fuck remakes and so on, blah, blah. There are a lot of remakes I don't like but there are a few that I thought "wow, that was awesome." Even if I had to see if from a view point of a "different" movie other than a side-by-side comparison to the original. Anyway, I'm really looking forward to seeing A Nightmare on Elm St.

It sucks that Robert Englund isn't Freddy. We all know and love him as Freddy but I'm not completely opposed to bringing someone fresh into the mix. During the first two films, Freddy was a serious guy, really fuckin scary and he gave us real nightmares. Then went on the other films where he turned out to be a real cool killer. We looked forward to his "punnies" and antics. When New Nightmare came out, I thought "this is the Freddy I fear." His dark, sinister presences gave me chills and I knew there were no jokes coming from him to ease that tension. The remake is taking us back to that person plus a back story, yay back stories! Just based on the trailer, I have no doubt that this movie won't shame the Freddy legend.

(I only hope he doesn't have that "big bad wolf" voice during the whole movie)

Let Me In (Let The Right One In Remake)

Ah, Let The Right One In, be still my heart. Again on the remake track, I have no problem with one of my favorite movies being Americanized. And I heard that this version will incorporate some of the book. I loved how the movie stuck mainly with the kids' story throughout the whole movie instead of spinning off into all the different characters in the book but I would like to see some elements of the book spliced into the new film. I had to run out and buy the book the same weekend I saw the movie because I was dying to know some sort of origins of Eli. I wanted to know how she got to be her and so on. I think if that's brought out in the new movie without complicating the story, it will turn out to be great. We'll see.

So far that's all I can think of right now. I'm sure I'm missing a few but those are the ones that I'm really looking forward to and I hope I'm not disappointed. Oh lord, don't let me be disappointed!

2010, bring us great movies!

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I Love Shorts: Unholy Night

We all know that Santa is evil. He stalks us, makes a list of shit we do. What a freakin' perv! Here's a short I came across that illustrate how evil that fucker can be.

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Saturday, December 19, 2009

Friday Film Recommendations: Dec 18th

Happy Friday! Here's this week's FFR.

The Girl Next Door

From the novel of Jack Ketchum, The Girl Next Door is based on a true story about a girl who was beaten and tortured by her aunt and neighborhood boys. The movie revolves around the cruelty the girl endures but also focuses on how scared others can be by not reporting such things. This movie is pretty disturbing so it's not for everyone.

Night of the Living Dorks

Dorky guys fuck around with voodoo, accidentally die then turn into zombies. This is an entertaining zombie comedy but the thing I enjoy it about it the most is the really awful dubbing over. Good times


A group of teenagers preparing an old horror movie show in an abandoned theatre discover a recording made by an actual murderer who died long ago. Very soon a shadowy figure resembling the killer starts stalking them one by one. A very awesome classic movie.

Pan's Labyrinth

One of my favorites. This is something that I would recommend to everyone, especially if you haven't seen it. This is the story about a young girl and the fantasy world she created, to survive the harsh reality during a time of war. It takes me back to the days when I used to have a care-free imagination. This is a intensely beautiful film and still really gets to me at the end.

Hit and Run

Back in Oct when I was watching a lot of horror movies, this was one of them. Read more here. I would rank this under "bored and will be willing to watch anything to be entertained."

Have a great weekend!

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Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Childhood Christmas Traumas

Let's be honest, Santa is kind of a scary guy. He watches you all the time to see if you're bad or good and if you're bad.... Oh shit, you better watch out! It's funny to see pictures of the little kids screaming and crappy themselves while sitting on Santa's lap, but for all we know, these kids could grow up all screwed up in the head. So based on that, I made a list of Christmas traumatized people.

Silent Night, Deadly Night

Billy doesn't like Santa. Why? Um because some crazy dude dressed up as Santa killed his parents! That's why! You can only imagine how such a thing can damage a child as Billy grows up to be a semi-normal teen with an aversion to Christmas. When Christmas time rolls around, he's forced to dress up like Santa which causes him to snap and punish the naughty.

Silent Night, Deadly Night 2

At the end of the first movie (spoiler?) Billy is killed in front of his younger brother Ricky causing more traumatic behavior. The cycle continues as Ricky takes over for his brother. Here's a clip of his madness (and yes, it does included the ever so infamous "GARBAGE DAY!" line)

Christmas Evil

We all had our moment when we found out that Santa wasn't real. The kids at school told us, we confronted our parents and they told us or maybe we pulled the beard off the mall's Santa. Whatever which way, we dealt with it. Harry found out there was no such thing as Santa when he caught his dad in a Santa suit getting ready to pork his mom. The traumatic effect it had on Harry was when he grew up he felt the need to take on the role as Santa. He watched over the neighborhood boys and girls to see who was good or bad. And he also made toys for a living. How very Santa of him. As Christmas time approached his obsession absorbed him to the point that he went all out to become Santa. He went around town delivering toys to the good kids and taking care of the bad people.


Some people just don't like Christmas. Maybe it's because they are grinches or maybe they had something bad happen them around the holiday times.

Kate relives a moment on why she hates Christmas.

Tales from the Darkside: Season of Belief

I don't know about anyone else who's seen this but holy crap did this episode scare the balls outta me as a kid.

Parents tell their kids a "made-up" story about an evil monster called the Grither who comes to get you when you say his name. In order for the Grither to stop, the story must be finished. The parents playfully fuck around while telling the story keeping their kids on edge till the story is over.

This episode is probably the most fucked up and violent episode out of the whole series. I was completely horrified after watching this and now being a lot older now, it still leaves me a little scared.

I hope everyone has a better Holiday than these folks!

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Monday, December 14, 2009

I Love Shorts: Anklebiters

Remember that tv show On The Lot? Yeah, me either. I did catch one episode when they directors had to do horror shorts and this one stuck with me.

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Sunday, December 13, 2009

Final Girl The Wicker Man (1973)

I was very happy to see that this month's Final Girl Film Club was The Wicker Man (do I really have to write "the original" or can we please all forget that the remake ever happened)?

I was happy about this choice because The Wicker Man is in my top 5 favorite movies of all time. I saw this for the first time about 4 years ago and it completely blew me away.

Sgt. Howie, a pure and down-right moral man, travels to the island of Summerisle looking for a missing girl. His noble intentions are not welcomed within the townsfolk and they give him the run around on the existence of the missing girl. He is left to believe that she died but his strong-will drives him to find out the truth.

Summerisle is ruled by pagans, where free love and teaching kids about sex is an every day thing. Sgt Howie, an ex-priest and still virgin, isn't down with their practices. He's like the teacher at the dance that makes sure you're not dancing too close to your date. As he tries to push his "right" ways on everyone, they are trying to break him down to just give in a little.

An example, and one of my favorite scenes, Willow, the landlord's daughter tries to use her beauty and charm on Howie to get him to flirt with the "dark" side. It doesn't work though, Howie's got a job to do and he isn't going to let some hot naked chick get in his way. It's too bad that his unbreakable spirit is his one downfall in this case.

The late and great Edward Woodward took on the role of Howie and brought a stern and believable force to the character. It's important that the audience know that Howie is set in his ways from the start and Woodward gives us that. We know from the beginning that he's going to go above and beyond to find this girl and he won't give into any distractions.

Christopher Lee, who plays Lord Summerisle, has the same strong beliefs but on a completely different spectrum. He wants to do everything he could to help the people on the island and he strongly believes that Howie is the key to that.

I guess I'll take a minute to bring up the remake. It was a complete mess from the original story. Cage's performance and take on the role seemed like he was sleepwalking through the whole thing. He wasn't convincing me at all. The island was turned into a breeding ground for man-hungry chicks. So basically, it was awful.

The Wicker Man is an amazingly brilliant occult thriller and the end still gives me the chills every time I watch it.

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Friday, December 11, 2009

Friday Film Recommendations: Dec 11th

Happy Friday All! Here's this week's FFR.

Black Christmas (1975)

I got the chance to see this over the weekend at Terror in the Aisle 3, now you get a chance to watch it via Netflix. This is definitely in the top horror holiday classics. If you dig this movie but are left wondering "Who the fuck is Billy?" I'll give you an "approach with caution" warning if you choose to see the remake. They make an attempt to breathe life into a "Billy" character. His whole back story is pretty out there and a tad bit icky. But the original is great so it's a must to check out.

Darkness Falls

I love how you can take any childhood icon and turn into a horror movie. In this movie, the Tooth Fairy is the one to fear. In the 1800's there was a woman that little children would take their fallen out teeth to in exchange for a gold coin. A few years later, tragedy struck her, first a fire in her house which caused her to not be able to go into any type of light, and then she was hung. There's a story that goes around the town of Darkness Falls about her, and she's called the Tooth Fairy. The story goes that she can't go in the light, and if you wake up and see her, she'll kill you.

This is the kind of movie you watch then kind of forget about later but it's not bad-bad. I'm recommending this because even though I don't remember much from it, I did think it was decent enough to buy so it's an entertaining time killer.


What can I say, this is a great fuckin' movie! I've mentioned bunches of times before I'm a huge anthology movie fan and Creepshow is one of the best and my favorite.

Terror Train

Jamie Leigh Curtis and 80's horror movies go together like pb&j. Mmm. In this oldie but a goodie, A college fraternity prank goes bad and a student ends up in the mental ward. Four years later, it's graduation time, and the members of the fraternity decide to have a costume party aboard a train trip to celebrate their graduation. Unknowingly to them, a killer has slipped aboard to kill them off.

The Good Son

At the time this movie came out, it shocked people to see their sweet Home Alone kid being sadistically sick little fucker. I, on the other hand thought it was awesome. As someone who's not looking to have kids in the future, I love how Mac's character Henry, plays on a "I'm a little kid, how can I possibly do wrong *insert sweet and loving smile here*" Growing up, me and my sibling would try to mess with each other and do pranks, but nothing to the point of fuckin' with our heads or trying to kill each other.

Mulberry Street

This movie was apart of After Dark Horrorfest II. A mysterious virus, carried by mutant rats, creates pandemonium in New York City in which rat-bite victims turn into homicidal rat-mutants. This movie centers on six tenants of a small apartment complex on the Lower East Side Mulberry Street as they fight to survive the night against the rats and rapidly multiplying cannibal mutants.

This is in the category of a "maybe it's a zombie movie-movie." Like the movie Black Sheep, (No, not the Chris Farley movie) people are changed into an animal and go off attacking and spreading the disease. I thought this movie was pretty cool but I didn't care too much about the third act. I still think it's worth a try.


During my 31 Days of Halloween bit, Bug was one of the movies I had to watch. Now that it's available online, ya'll can watch it too. There goes in the "this may not be for everyone" kind of movie but I thought it was pretty great and the ending still leaves me in a "dude..." state of mind.

Have a great weekend!